i just hoped i could get the opinion of someone who doesent know me on this.
I am 36, and for the last year or so have been attempting, with some success, and a few hiccups, to develop the spiritual side of myself that i have long ignored. During this time i have attempted to find a person or group, local to me where i can find advice ect, (i live rather rurally)
I first tried a local lady, healer and clairvoyant, nice lady, said i was surrounded with spirit energy, saw guides ect. I did then meet with and begin to work with my guides more closely. She asked me to a de velopment day at her home, which was a good day, she also told me she was going to be my 'guru', then i never heard from her again! i did try calling her, but she never got back to me, it dident surprise me really, and i dont pester people. So, back to the drawing board! started having rieki with a nice girl, who told me she belonged to this womans group, i decided not to discuss my experience too much with her. The rieki is a real positive, and has made a real difference so far in many ways. (allthough i am finding the cost a bit much). I found a spiritual development course, bieng taught locally by another woman, and enrolled. This course is about mastering your life through meditation and awareness of spirit, it is quite expensive, but she is hiring a hall so has overheads. We are now a month in, and i have mixed feelings. I want so much to belong to a group, but i feel slightly uncomfortable with areas of the teaching, which strike me as somewhat self motivated, i wont give details, but this course is based on the teachings of an ascended master, who channels through this woman. I have no problems with this as such, but sometimes i feel this ladys attitude is somewhat careless, i just dont have a really positive feeling about her or the class. Now she is changing the venue, to her home, which is not convienient to me, i have a feeling she wants to merge with another group she teaches near her home. I did tell her of my experience with the first lady i met, and she sympathised, then announced the next week that she had met this woman, and been invited to join her closed circle- whatever that means! the class teaches that we need to learn to float serenly through life, which i think as a mother of two may be rather beyond me! Is it worth staying in a group like this? there really is nothing else currently open to me, i'm sure both this lady and her teachings are good and worthy, but i just feel 'wrong' somehow, am i too fussy? shouldi just stick to myself and spirit?

HI I know you sent this message a while ago but Ive only just started reading this forum. You've probably already solved your problem but if I can help at all I'll keep an eye out for your post . Best of luck I hope you've already found some guidance.

I feel it is good to try many groups. It can give insight and learning to the diverse ways of teaching and meditation. It also gives a chance to feel the different energies of other people and groups. I have visited groups where the energy is light and happy and relaxing, where it is clear by the energy felt that I was truly not welcome and neither was anyone else. Perhaps it is what the individual wants to get out of it as to if they stay or not.

A closed circle can be a group who has been sitting for a long time, their energies are settled together and they wish only the people there to progress further together, or the group will not take more people than so many say 6 or 8 and when the number is reached and steady that's it. no one else can join. some closed groups go on to develop physical mediumship. An open group, anyone can join at any time to see if they like it, etc. In an open group people tend to come and go. in a closed group the same people stay fr a long time.

If there is a Spiritualist church near, it can be a good place to seek opportunity to join a circle or information about how to and where they are. Meditating each day even if only for 15 minutes can aid individual development, This can be done alone or with others.

It's now eight months since you posted this post. Perhaps you have given up. perhaps you have found a group, perhaps you are meditating alone.

Perhaps you will post back and let us know how you are getting on

Gilly.